I’m blogggin on a jetplane. Â Now until Jan 15th there’s free wifi on Virgin America, yo.
Which officially gave me absolutely zero excuse to not post anything. Â I was like, “Shit, mayne, is been a while,” and I thought that whatever post I come back with has to be pee-in-your-pants good, but then I realized that probably all people want is a pretty picture and a chuckle and that’ll do, pig, rather than anything lifechanging. Â So this post will be whatever I finish in the short flight between San Diego and San Francisco (67 mins not counting getting up to and down from 10,000 feet).
I thought about just sneaking in this post like I hadn’t been neglecting MTFB to the point where it’s grown hair like the Warlock’s Heart. Â Kind of like how sometimes, when I’m visiting someone’s apartment complex and I am too lazy or am unable to ascertain which exact apartment I should call up to to be buzzed in, I just ring the first apartment and, when they answer, say, “It’s me! I’m here!” Â And when they say, politely, “Wait, who is this?” I just shout “MEEEE!” and more often than not they buzz you in.
OK. Â Yelp says that Blue Barn Gourmet, which is just the charmingest, preciousest little joint on Chestnut street, has the world’s best BLT. Â When I read that I said aloud, in a voice full of wonder, “THE WORLD’S BEST BEE ELL TEEEE?” like Buddy the Elf. Â I didn’t buy it. Â For one thing, it’s a fucking seasonal sando (they call them “sandos” so that redeems them a bit, but STILL). Â If it’s so signaturey then it should be on their menu as their Greatest Hit Special! Â Now that I look at their website, I realize they actually do give it a special name: The Barn BLT. Â I still reserve the right to be growchy. Â Because, make up your mind. Â If it’s so signaturey as to be your eponymous sando, then stop it with this seasonal business.
Inside: Niman bacon, mixed greens, heirloom tomatoes, goat cheese, and pesto on country levain. Â Ah. Â Makes sense. Â This would be the world’s best BLT to someone who fancies themselves a foodie food critic but is actually a rube publishing their first review on Yelp with trembling fingers. Â I mean, Niman Ranch meat X… “greens” instead of lettuce… “heirloom” making its requisite appearance… hello again goat cheese – you seem to be everywhere even though I see no G or C in BLT… finally, an unfamiliar type of bread that probably just means sourdough? Â Foodie-by-numbers, Foodie Mad Libs.
Not that it wasn’t delicious. My favorite touch was that the whole shebang was pressed, with butter, and the bacon was juicy but not stringy. Â However. Â I really love that classic diner BLT – on shitty Wonder Bread, slathering of full fat mayo, sad iceberg and crunchy tomato (in all other arenas, a tomato should certainly never make a sound when you bite into it), and bacon that has been nuked to shattery goodness in the fridge. Â That’s MY world’s best BLT.
Blue Barn Gourmet
2105 Chestnut (at Steiner)
SF CA 94123
415.441.3232
Nice Beedle the Bard reference!
Thanks! 😀 Thanks for enabling that reference!