Bacon, with, like, CHOCOLATE around it!

by janet on January 15th, 2009

Hi. Don’t mind me. I’m just sulking in my apartment because Daniel is out at C&O’s with my roomie Tinx, who he is taking out for her birthday.

Me: Interesting how you didn’t take ME out to C&O’s for MY hatch day.
Daniel: Well I didn’t give TINX a giftcard to Lesportsac did I?
Me: Yes but being BFFs means I get to be unabashedly jealous whenever I want.
Daniel: Fair enough. I bought TEN boxes of Girl Scout Cookies today!!!
Me: SAMOAAAAAAS!

So. Normally when rejected, a girl reaches for chocolate. But I don’t like chocolate. And besides, there’s an Iron Chef on right now and it’s Battle BACON (how have they not thought of that before today!??!) and the challenger just made an Irish-bacon stuffed scallop wrapped in American bacon, thus all I want is bacoooooooooon!

Wait. There may be some sort of compromise that could happen here.

Enter Vosges’ Mo’s Bacon Bar. You’ve seen them at Whole Foods – I know you have. You probably pointed it out to your friends and laughed and placed the box back down, but I’m that type of chick who went ahead and purchased it. And ate it on the way to the cash register.

Granted, I am the sweet+savory monkey. So of COURSE I would love it. But listen. You like peanut butter filled pretzels, right? Well, think of the most gourmet, high-quality peanut butter pretzel, and then add another order of magnitude of rich decadence. That’s what it’s like.

Oh, shit! Judging time, gotta go get my salivation on. My three most favorite judges – Akiko Katayama, Mo Rocca, and of course, the man who I wish was my uncle, Jeffrey Steingarten!

Buy yo bacon here.

UPDATE: A fucking tie! Bah. I hate Bobby Flay, and this is why.

One Response to “Bacon, with, like, CHOCOLATE around it!”

  1. [...] anglaise, but gelatinized somehow. (b) Gold leaf tastes like nothing. (c) Can someone put some bacon in this [...]

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